With All That's Happening in the World...

This was sent some months ago by voicemail from a viewer identifying himself as Gallon Pencil (not his real name):

Wayne, the following joke -- wait, can you hear me? ‘kay. The following joke has almost certainly been made before, however as far as I know it hasn’t, therefore I’m claiming ownership. Here we go:

Wayne, it has come to my understanding that one of the cartoonish leaders of your beloved, once-great Democratic Party, I’m speaking of the orca from Cape Cod, Schmed Schmennedy (not his real name), has written a children’s book all about the exploits of his little pet dog named Splash (his actual name). And that makes me wonder: does the story of Splash take place in Chappaquiddick?

To respond or forward, press one. To skip, press the pound key. To delete, press star D.